Final preparations for 2012

This morning, I sat down again and hammered out more concrete plans for my goals.  I don't want to leave any room for error, any room to slip and get complacent.  I want to spend the whole year pushing myself forward incrementally, so that 365 days from now I can look back and see massive improvement in every major area of my life.

The financial picture will be rough for a few months.  I don't want to kid myself into thinking everything will be magically better and I will get my head above water without any effort.  But a few things will help me a lot --getting rid of this huge ($400/mo) car payment, paying less in rent, my mom getting hired on full-time so she needs less help, and paying off my credit card and a couple of other monthly payments with my tax refund so that those are not hanging over my head anymore.  In the first month or two, I will definitely be in the kind of place where every little bit helps.  So those monthly payments not being due will be a big help.

Another big help will be moving back to Greenville, and spending so much less on gas.  I will be even closer to work than I used to be, back when I was only using one tank of gas each paycheck.  I am so excited I can barely stand it -- it really can't come soon enough.  I almost want to hibernate until it's time to move, because I'm getting into a very tight spot with gas.  I know I just have to buckle down and make it through -- I get paid again in a week.  (Not that my next check isn't pretty much already spent on bills, but then I'll be able to start seriously thinking about filing taxes.)  I am creating a budget that I will have to stick to religiously, and there's just no way around it.

Part of that budget is going to be my 4HB experiment.  It saves me a lot of money in groceries (should be $3/24 eggs, $6/1 pound of turkey, $1.20/canned beans and diced tomatoes, $10/fish fillets, $6/veggies -- and I can always sub canned tuna for fish fillets for awhile, since things will be extra tight; also, I have a big bag of chicken breasts begging to be consumed).  The 4HB experiment will do a lot for me beyond budget -- it's a great way for me to ramp up into a lifetime of fitness and good health.  Beginning with a 3x/week posterior chain workout and 2-3x/week Zumba is a nice, no-pressure way to get started.  Eating in a disciplined manner will help me get used to how it feels long-term.  Taking bi-weekly progress pictures and shots of the food I'm eating will help keep me realistic and on-target.  And the best part is, I think it's really going to work -- so everything else building from there will be even better.

I have counted out twelve weeks that I plan to do the 4HB experiment just as described.  It takes about twelve weeks, they say, for other people to notice a difference.  I'm going to stick to one thing long enough to make a noticeable difference, and then build from there.  Twelve weeks brings me to 3/25, and then I will toss an extra week in there for a good baker's dozen.  Beginning 4/2, I will do the nine week Couch to 5k program -- not instead of, but in addition to, what I'm already doing.  So that will be a posterior chain workout 3x/week, running 3x/week, and Zumba 2-3x/week.  Building, adding on, and improving -- the first half of the year will be dedicated to fat loss.

Beginning 6/1, I want to start tackling some more serious strength work.  I would like to really master my body weight, so I will look at incorporating the You are Your Own Gym workout.  Successive ten week workouts will take me all the way to the end of the year, getting stronger and stronger.  Of course, I will not be giving up cardio -- I will simply lighten up the load a bit, to put the focus squarely on strength.  I will most likely go the the 20 min Zumba, and I am not going to lie to myself -- I'm not going to be running outside from June until probably October, nor do I plan to get another gym membership ever, ever again.  So unless we end up with a treadmill, running will have to wait until it cools off again (this opens up the possibility of another abbreviated or even full-length Couch to 5k at the end of the year, switching out Zumba for running).

The rest of my plans involve organization and education -- compared to the first two areas, these will be the easiest to tackle by far.  I have to set up a space for school, and I have to set up a very specific schedule.  I need to impose exam dates and "assignment due" dates, and I need to devote one day off a week to whatever needs to get done for school.  I need to get everything organized in our new home and keep it that way, to make everything much easier in the long run.

This whole year is about putting everything into its place, developing better habits, and putting myself in the best position I've ever been in for the rest of my life.  After all, 2013 will be the last year of my twenties, and I have to start tackling bigger and better goals!  This year is all about the amazing changes I will make to prepare myself for the even more amazing things to come.  And I am super ready.

My 4 Hour Body Experiment

I've decided to start here, and see where this takes me.  Honestly, I'm excited to see the results -- I think it will be amazing.  Here's the gist of it all!

6 days a week, I will stick to the same few meals: coffee and 2-3 whole eggs for breakfast (either scrambled in microwave or hard boiled; easy peasy), either a Moe's Closetalker salad or tuna with chopped onions and beans for lunch with veggies, and chili, chicken, or fish for dinner.  Once a week I will make a big batch of chili or chicken, and I will eat it all week.  I will also steam veggies in the morning or the night before and spread it out through all my meals for the day.  This will make it easier for me to eat properly and not take a ton of time to get ready for work in the morning -- I can even bring a lot of it to work and keep it in the fridge, ready and waiting for me!  Also waiting for me at work will be cans of soda -- cans, because that will help keep me honest.  I will not have more than 16oz of Diet Coke a day.  Ever again.

One day a week, I will start the day with a protein and fiber rich meal (I think this will work out to be eggs, beans and coffee before church).  Then I will follow the rules for managing the situation, but I will eat whatever I want that day.  This will help me keep myself under control during the week, because I will put any cravings I happen to have on a list of things to eat on my cheat day.  If I don't want them anymore on cheat day, I won't eat them, but the list will keep me mentally sane.

I will have sugar free jell-o if I really can't stand it, but I don't really want to open that door; I know that I can do this without jell-o!

There are a few tricks I picked up to stay on track more easily and make my results even better.  I will keep track by taking bi-weekly pictures in my underwear, and by taking a picture of each meal before I eat it.  I will use an ice pack on the back of my neck for 30 minutes five days a week in the evenings/after work.  I will mentally divide my plate into thirds and wait five minutes between thirds, chewing each mouthful at least 20 times.  And three times a week, I will do the posterior chain workout first thing -- 20 two-legged glute activation raises from the floor, 15 flying dogs on each side, and 50 kettlebell swings.

There's nothing in this plan that's not manageable, and I think I can ride this through my final goal.  Howevever, I'm taking the advice of the program and only committing for two week stints.  I will take my before pictures, do the plan for two weeks, and take my second set of pictures -- then I will evaluate the pictures and how I feel afterwards, and decide whether to re-commit or not.  This isn't something I have to do, it's something that I choose to do to bring myself to better health!

I will definitely be keeping track of all of this here; so keep looking if you want to see how it goes.

Nothing changes if nothing changes...

Today I'm feeling a lot of inspiration.  I added my goals to the sidebar so that I will see them when I check the blog -- I feel like nobody's paying attention, but thinking that someone might be will also keep me more honest.  My horoscope today said not to take risks with a venture that you NEED to complete (as opposed to want).  It said to stick with what I know will produce results, and that's what I'm going to do.  Focus on producing results.

Because the goals are at 10% increments, the first few are large goals -- the first goal weight is a 25 pound loss!  So I am breaking it up like this:

Mini-goal #1:  250
Mini-goal #2:  245
Mini-goal #3:  240
Mini-goal #4:  235
Goal #1:           230
Five pound increments are easy, attainable, and will quickly add up to HUGE results!
Here comes a brand new me.

reflections and resolutions

While I agree that we should always be looking forward and should always be setting resolutions and pursuing goals with fervor, it is natural to spend some time this year reflecting -- and then looking forward to what comes next.

I made a few decisions this year that propelled me back onto the right track after what feels like a long time away.  First, I made the decision #1, to return to South Carolina to make a way for myself.  The cost of living is lower, the mountains are beautiful, and there are some really wonderful things here.  Like decision #2, to return to my job -- I enjoy the people, I enjoy the feeling that I make a difference, and I enjoy working in a place where it feels like what I do is noticed and appreciated.  My loyalty and dedication is rewarded.  And a lot of the time, we have a lot of fun.  In any time, but especially in this economy, that is a true blessing.  To bolster this decision, I made decision #3, to begin a program working towards a vet tech degree.  While I have been moving through this program at about the speed of molasses, I do think it was a smart choice.

And that's where I am.  For much of the year, I felt like I was in the right place, but it wasn't the right time.  I wasn't quite sure what was next.  I'm starting to think that 2012 will be the right time -- or, at least, will provide a rock solid foundation for what is next.  I'm starting to feel like everything that I do from here on out will make a significant impact on the future.  It's a really nice feeling, so I'm glad that I'm here, but part of me is so curious about what is next that I think maybe I'm missing out on a lot of things here in the moment.  Perhaps I should be more mindful.

Perhaps I should be a lot of things.

To that end, I suppose I should make some New Year's resolutions.  Hopefully not the kind that I will immediately forget about.  It feels like yesterday that I decided I would follow the Paleo diet 100% in 2011...I made it about one full day.  Unless Diet Coke isn't Paleo, then I made it maybe six hours.  So I want to be sure that the things I talk about doing in 2012 are things that I will actually do.  What's the point of setting myself up to fail?  I want to feel like I'm succeeding and thriving all year long!

I already mentioned here that I have three major areas I'm interested in working on: health, finances, and overall organization.  Since then, I added a few more things I think need to be a focus in 2012: my relationship, my mental health, and my education.  To that end, I've created six resolutions:

1. I will work out at least six days a week, and meal plan weekly for food to support weight loss.
2. I will work within a strict budget and focus on improving my credit score and bottom line.
3. I will create a home management binder, mail station, and maintain an organized household.
4. I will honor and appreciate my guy daily; I will strive to be a Proverbs 31 woman for him.
5. I will practice meditation for at least two minutes daily, and build slowly from there.
6. I will create and maintain a schedule for school work to ensure that I stay on track.

I will do a weight circuit first thing when I get up daily.  On days that I'm off or have a half shift, I will also do a Zumba DVD.  By meal planning weekly, I will be able to support fat loss and also stay within my budget easily.  I'll keep track of everything going on by utilizing all my new organization ideas -- the filer on the refrigerator, the binder, the mail station for all the random paperwork, etc.  I'll make sure to find a way every day to let my guy know how much I appreciate him and everything he is to me.  I will take a minute in the car, before and after work, to focus on my breathing and get myself into the right frame of mind for the day.  And I will use my new organizational skills to organize my stuff for school with a study schedule, self-imposed exam dates, and a steady, solid plan for getting through this so that I can move on to what's next.

If I do 2012 right, 2013 is going to be amazing, and each year after that will only be even better.

heavy decisions, big changes

The new year is closing in, and there will be some changes in store.

Firstly, Mike and I will be taking over a lease on a duplex.  We are supposedly doing this for a few months until we can re-review our financial situation and possibly secure a mortgage.  While I'm fine with that, I'm secretly hoping this will be a comfortable, nice place for us to start our life and get everything together: the animals, our finances, my health, our work, etc.  And I know that will take more than three to four months.  I will be fine with staying there for as long as is necessary, if it's as cozy as I'm hoping it will be.  I know better than most, though, that planning these things is pretty much useless.  What will be, will be -- I'll be able to deal with whatever comes.  And if in three months our credit reports have magically fixed themselves and a dream house falls into our lap along with a dream mortgage and astoundingly low rates, who will I be to complain?  A fool!

However, I am looking forward to our first "home" -- a place where I can get things organized just the way I want them, and set precendents for future homes that we will share.  I am excited to get my cats back, to put all of our "kids" together and create a feline and canine version of the Brady Bunch.  I would like to be able to use the space to start putting in order what it means to be an "us" in an environment that's completely under our control.  I think it will be nice, and I wouldn't mind drawing it out for awhile.

 

 

New home for 2012, here we come.

Beginning to look ahead...

The most beautiful thing about the past few months is that I have really started to live.  Breaking down walls and allowing my heart to open brought me the best blessing I could have ever asked for: a man who I truly, wholly believe is The One.  I've settled into a nice, comfortable, mature adult relationship, and it has been lovely.

It has not, however, fixed all my problems.  There are big goals ahead of me -- things I have to accomplish.  The good news?  2012 is going to be the perfect year to accomplish them.  These are things that go on my list every single year, and basically get ignored every single year.  But not this year, because I finally have every reason in the world to tackle them once and for all.

The first obstacle to my happy future is my health.  I will get it under control this year, with Zumba and Weight Watchers and doing what I need to get done.  I will not ignore these goals: I want to be a beautiful bride, I want to be a trophy wife, I want to be amazing.

The second obstacle to my happy future is my financial profile.  I've started to contribute to my 401(k) at work.  I am going to switch my accounts out of Wells Fargo, I am going to start using a zero balance budget and an envelope system to manage my money, and I am going to begin a debt snowball to get rid of my debt.  The main reason for this?  My credit score HAS to improve this year, so I can get a great house and live a happy life.

The final major goal on my list for 2012 is to be completely organized.  I've got a lot of blogs to help me get everything taken care of.  Soon we'll be moving into a new place, and I'm going to start from scratch to run a household.  The first two goals will dovetail into the third goal; I'll have everything organized and running smoothly in time for 2013!

I'm ready to go, and I'm ready to document it all.  So be on the lookout for more posts from me soon!

It's a new dawn, a new day -- and I'm feeling good...

My life has not been my own. 

I've given up my own power, my own sense of self, by making excuses for all of my behavior.  I've been blaming people from the past for the string of "mistakes" that I've dubbed bad decisions; one way or another, for years I have given over control of my own happiness.  Last night, though, as I had a chance to finally tell my story from pretty much start to finish, I was able to grasp with new clarily that I am absolutely in control of how I move forward from here.

Armed with this clarity and guarding it with everything I have, I can finally begin to make myself whole again.

I suppose it's true that sometimes you have to really, genuinely lose everything before you can start over.
I also suppose it's true that sometimes what you think is rock bottom simply is not.